My Cultural Diet

Sometimes you just want to watch a movie that’s — to quote Nick Nunziata from his review of Transporter 2 — dumber than a bucket of lotion. At the same time, you don’t want to hate yourself for watching it. Roland Emmerich’s Moonfall is definitely the former and I still pretty much felt the latter. I’m a sucker for Dyson spheres and other sci-fi megastructures, as well as depictions of Kardashev-level civilizations, so that was cool, but that’s about all that Moonfall has going for it. The dialog is even lamer than you’d expect, the product placement and Elon Musk fanboy-ism as annoying as you’d expect, the cast’s talents are wasted, and despite its considerable budget, the production, visual effects, etc., look disappointingly cheap. Shortly after finishing Moonfall, I watched several scenes from 1996’s Independence Day (also directed by Emmerich), and any random five minutes of that movie contains more charm, excitement, and visual panache than all of Moonfall’s 130 minutes combined.

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